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It’s time for colleges to stop coddling sore losers

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I cannot state with absolute “certitude” that these reports are true, however, I have tried my best to unravel the mysteries of the big bang (Donald Trump as president).

According to several media outlets — some traditional, some not so — colleges across the wide expanse of our country are giving students coloring books, Play Doh, therapy dogs, hot chocolate, self-care courses, and even a free pass on finals so they can deal with Hillary’s loss.

I cannot believe the level of stupidity of those that run what is supposed to be the pillars of higher education in this country.

At Cornell, they hosted a cry-in where staff gave out tissues and hot cocoa, a Wall Street Jounal blog reports. This establishment costs upwards of $50,000 per year for students to attend.

Tufts University countered the students despondency with arts and crafts (a year there costs a whopping $63,400).

Students at the University of Michigan were given Play Doh and coloring books to deal with their depression and anxiety — this from a school that costs $28,000 if you live in the state and an outrageous $60,000 if you are out of state.

Yale — that Ivy league fortress of “piled higher and deeper” — costs $63,000 per year and gave students a pass on finals if they were too distraught to take their tests, according to conservative blog PJ Media.

The University of Pennsylvania provided emotional support puppies, coloring books, and chocolate, according to right-wing blog Breitbart News.

And lastly, the University of Michigan Law School provided post-election self-care to its graduate law students, according to USA Today. For only $53,000 per year (in state) and $56,000 per year (out of state), prospective attorneys will be in the educational abyss.

Not for Nuthin,™ but these places of higher learning should have their university statuses revoked, the professors’ degrees should be tossed, and the schools’ governing boards should refund money to each and every parent that paid tuition on the grounds that none of these are real universities but just very expensive sleep-away pre-Ks.

My wish for all of my readers this Thanksgiving:

• May you never lose hope that you’ve run out of time, and may you always have time left to say “goodbye.”

• May you always have the ability to laugh at yourself and have your tongue firmly planted in your cheek.

• May you always have the time you need, the time to appreciate the small things, and the time to live through the big things.

• May your turkey be juicy, your gravy not lumpy, your sides plentiful and only split with laughter, and, most important, may you always have the time to savor those pies.

Thanks to those who read my words, whether you agree or don’t doesn’t matter, because without you, there wouldn’t be a “Not for Nuthin™.”

Happy Thanksgiving.

Follow me on Twitter @JDelBuono.

Joanna DelBuono writes about national issues every Wednesday on BrooklynDaily.com. E-mail her at jdelbuono@cnglocal.com.
Updated 11:48 am, January 16, 2019
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