Ladies please, put those boobs away.
What depths have we submerged ourselves to? No I don’t want to see bare breasted women, and I don’t want to see bare breasted men in Times Square. I don’t care how much you might think that two sagging, swaying, lemons in socks are a work of art, they are not — even if they are painted in the red, white and blue.
I do not want to see naked breasts as I walk along city streets — or bare-breasted men, naked cowboys, or naked cowgirls, either.
When I visit Manhattan I want to see shops, museums, and Broadway shows, enjoy the fantastic architecture, dine at a fine restaurant and yes, even people-watch — but not boobs, buns, and painted bodies.
For those that want to bare their breasts, take yourselves to an appropriate forum — go to the beach, work in a topless bar, and jiggle your heart’s content, go ahead — just don’t subject me and the rest of the public to it.
And don’t use art as an excuse to hide behind when all you really want to do is make a few bucks and have your 15 minutes of fame.
To those people who think I am a prude, old fashioned, or have issues because my mother didn’t breast feed me — my suggestion is to take a very long walk off of a very short pier.
There is a time and place for every naked breast under heaven — in the right circumstances, at the right time, just not in public places.
Sorry, but I draw the line at having boobs cavorting in my face.
Women, do us all a favor and don’t carry on about equal rights to go shirtless — do not insult our collective intelligence — because this really is not about the equal rights that Gloria Steinem fought for. Nor why she burned her bra.
What Gloria, along with every other female in the women’s liberation movement, wanted was for women to be treated equally — not as objects.
To receive equal pay for equal work.
Be hired in equal positions.
To be accepted for our intelligence and abilities.
To be equal partners.
To not be objectified as a sexual object.
Unfortunately, 50 years on, we have come down to this. I can be equal by parading my breasts and get paid for it, by posing with tourists who are ultimately objectifying my breasts.
Let me enlighten you — having pictures taken of your naked boobs for money is on par with posing for “Playboy,” “Penthouse” and all the other nudie magazines that objectify women.
Be honest — you are not freeing your nipples because of art’s sake, you are freeing your nipples to make a buck. Let’s call it what it is — porn — pure, plain, and simple.
Not for Nuthin™, but if that ain’t objectification, then I don’t know what is.
Follow me on Twitter @JDelBuono.