Meet your Idiotarod winner — Disasterpiece!

The Brooklyn Paper
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It’s been five years burning down the road, but Disasterpiece has finally claimed the Idiotarod race’s top prize of “best in show.”

The team, wearing colorful full-body monster costumes in the annual shopping cart race on Saturday, raced through the snow in monster-themed costumes from Bushwick to Greenpoint in under four hours.

“It’s the proudest moment of my life!” said Disasterpiece member Rachel Brill.

Idiotarod judges cited the team’s exuberance, creative costume design, and eagerness to bribe the contest’s judges with gifts.

“They have the total package,” said referee Anney Fresh. “Their cart is modular, they’ve got the bribery down, they have costumes which poke people in the bar. That’s enough for me.”

Disasterpiece, which included Brill, Emily Ente, Eric Sipra, and Stephen and Paul Schafenberger, outlasted nearly 30 other teams, braving slushy sidewalks, frigid temperatures and sabotage attempts from competitors.

Other teams in the fabled third jewel of the hipster Triple Crown trotted out top notch costumes, including one team dressed like Natalie Portman in “Black Swan,” another as black and gold bumble bees, another clad as flannel-wearing lumberjacks, and even some techno-Vikings complete with a wooden rolling battleship.

But only three teams really had a chance at the top prize, judges said.

Disasterpi­ece’s fiercest rivals, a team of purple, gold and green tight-wearing revelers called “Mardis Gras,” won a special “ex-nemesis” award for being the team that the judges loved to hate.

Another cutthroat collective, “Noble Company,” secured “best industrial design,” a top costume award, for competing in a giant, transformer-like military robot on stilts.

Noble Company’s Rudy Bustamante was exhausted at the end of the race, explaining that he spent much of the day clearing snow and slush off the sidewalk so his teammate wouldn’t fall.

“It was a vicious ride,” said Bustamante. “Our goal was to make sure our team never stopped moving.”

After receiving her award, Ente basked in her team’s performance, earning a coveted place in Idiotarod’s respected history.

“I’m gong to drink a beer, go dance, and yell like a monster,” said Ente.

The Idiotarod follows SantaCon and the No Pants Subway ride as the trio of essential hipster events. The season now closes until the next Todd P. event at a soon-to-be-closed Bushwick club.

Updated 5:22 pm, July 9, 2018
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Reasonable discourse

Joey from Clinton Hills says:
was this race fixed? why was this team's picture in the paper last week before the race? very fishy.
Jan. 31, 2011, 11:55 am
Sam from Bk says:
What are the specifications for this race? IQ under 70?
Feb. 4, 2011, 6:35 pm

Comments closed.

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