Lousy Labatt is new Bud

The Brooklyn Paper
Share on TwitterTweet
Share on Facebook

Don’t miss our updates:

Full disclosure: I drank the first pint of Labatt’s at Freddy’s this week.

Fuller disclosure: It tasted lousy.

Fullest disclosure: That’s not a comment on Freddy’s boycott of Brooklyn Lager; Labatt’s really is lousy.

Reasonable people can disagree on whether Freddy’s Bar is justified in boycotting Brooklyn Lager because brewery owner Steve Hindy supports Bruce Ratner’s Atlantic Yards project — a project that will result in the demise of the 100-plus-year-old Freddy’s.

But reasonable people cannot disagree on one thing: Freddy’s owner Donald O’Finn picked a weak substitute for the beer of Kings.

I know this because I took a silver bullet for you, dear reader, by drinking the first pint of Labatt Blue that flowed from O’Finn’s formerly Brooklyn Lager tap. Here are my tasting notes:

“Crisp, very light, and hoppy; has about as much body as a cocaine-addled supermodel; tastes like an upscale Budweiser; it’s not offensive — which is offensive.”

Here are my tasting notes for Brooklyn Lager: “Rich and thick with notes of honey, malt, cedar wood, filberts and Brooklyn integrity; a superior beer.”

Having consumed O’Finn’s politically correct new beer, I questioned him on his poor choice.

“Well, I chose Labatt because I thought Canada had no eminent domain, but upon deeper research, I found out that they do,” said O’Finn at Monday’s boycott celebration. “So now I’m in search of a country that has no eminent domain. I just hope they make a good beer.”

One man immediately yelled out, “What about Russia?” but his suggestion was immediately tabled. “Russian beer sucks,” someone else screamed.

And, lest we forget, eminent domain is alive and very well in that former Soviet republic.

Gersh Kuntzman is the Editor of The Brooklyn Paper. E-mail Gersh at
Updated 4:00 pm, November 10, 2010
Today’s news:
Share on TwitterTweet
Share on Facebook

Don’t miss our updates:

Reasonable discourse

Comments closed.

First name
Last name
Your neighborhood
Email address
Daytime phone

Your letter must be signed and include all of the information requested above. (Only your name and neighborhood are published with the letter.) Letters should be as brief as possible; while they may discuss any topic of interest to our readers, priority will be given to letters that relate to stories covered by The Brooklyn Paper.

Letters will be edited at the sole discretion of the editor, may be published in whole or part in any media, and upon publication become the property of The Brooklyn Paper. The earlier in the week you send your letter, the better.

Keep it local!

Stay in touch with your community. Subscribe to our free newsletter: